LOCAL MAN HITS HEAD WAKES UP WEARING SILK HEAD SCARF DREAMING OF TULUM

Local man Marcus Thornby, 34, who once described Tulum day parties as "everything wrong with modern society," Woke from a concussion last week with an inexplicable and all-consuming desire to attend a Melodic Techno party, sources confirmed Tuesday.

Thornby, previously one of the most vocal critics of 'the Tulum scene' and anyone who has ever worn a silk scarf on their head, now spends upwards of 14 hours per day researching flight prices to Mexico and watching Keinemusik DJ set recordings on YouTube.

"It's like he's a completely different person," said longtime friend who wished not to be named. "Two weeks ago, he called everyone at these parties 'trustafarians' Now he won't stop talking about 'the vibe' and asking if I think he'd look good in linen slacks. It's obvious he's lost his mind."

Medical records show Thornby sustained the injury after slipping on a wet floor at his local Tesco while trying to fish out a discounted cottage pie from a lower shelf.

Thornby now wears his medical head bandage wrapped in a silk scarf, paired with round sunglasses he refuses to remove indoors. Unable to afford the £2,000 ticket to Tulum, he has developed an alternative: holding his iPhone approximately three inches from his face while watching set recordings, claiming the proximity makes "the visuals look way bigger, almost like you're actually there."

When asked if he had considered purchasing a VR headset, Thornby appeared confused by the question.

Thornby has also begun filming everything he encounters in a vertical iPhone style typically reserved for capturing DJ sets at festivals, often whistling at full volume like a desert coyote.

At press time, Thornby was lying on his sofa in the dark, holding his iPhone two inches from his face, watching a four-hour sunset set from 2019, and describing the experience as "genuinely transcendent, mate."